He wants to work the garden; she wants a kitchen sink. He’s doing his best for all of them, she knows, so they can eat their own vegetables during these lean times without an income.
He’s juggling so much, with job applications and home renovations and a totally re-landscaped block. Racing to plant before the cold sets in. He’s in his element with lots of projects on the go. She’s struggling. It’s not how she works. She likes to focus on one thing, get it done and then move on to the next.
Stress, frustration, fear of the unknown mount, climb the walls of the house, hang from the ceiling in great grey clouds, looking to separate and destroy. Voices rise and harsh words fly.
She hangs her head in shame. He brings her a cup of tea.
It’s almost ridiculous the amount they’ve achieved in just a few months. No one works harder than he does.
‘I’m sorry,’ she says.
‘I’m doing this all for you, for us.’
‘I know,’ she says.
She puts down her schedule and fixation with the sink to walk outside into the sunshine, put her gumboots on. To plant and rake by his side, because together, they’ll see more grow and be fruitful. Together the grey clouds blow away and fear crawls back into a dark forgotten corner.
margot halladay says
Dear precious Alison,
Thank you so much for your honesty and for your insight into how important it is that we change our perspective and priorities at times to get in better sync with our spouse. I absolutely love the part in the intro you say how much energy it takes to be angry. This is so true!! Reconciliation does take humility and turning away from the resentment that comes from me being convinced that my way is the best path. Thanks so much for sharing and I will be continuing in prayer for God to provide a great job for Stu. Love Margot ( and please keep writing)!
Annelies Smeekes says
Hi Alison, you hang in there, I understand your frustrations but it doesn’t take long for you to see Stu’s point of view. God is good and my prayers are with you praying that Stu will be provided with work and what ever Gods plan is for him. We are living on very uncertain times and all the more reason to trust God and His faithfulness. Love to you all and God bless you for openly sharing your thoughts and feelings.